Rough day, rough night for Kirby

Special Boy is getting his MRI on Wednesday. Also, he was grubby and dirty. So Friday, he got a nice, thorough bath with barely-warm water, which is the only water there was because the pilot light in the water heater went out. There are a lot of things that Kirby does not understand about the world, and plenty of things he doesn't know, and some things that he forgets he knows. One thing he knows for sure is that he is supposed to get a special treat after his bath. The most special of all special treats is pig ear. He will tear all around the place until he gets his treat, and it had better be a pig ear. So I gave him a pig ear. Big mistake. Pig ear makes him super-itchy. Now we know. No pig ear. No pork products for that matter. And now that has passed out of his system and he is super-clean and extra-handsome and perfectly soft and shiny and sweet-smelling. And, for some reason, extra-cuddly, too.

But he's getting his MRI on Wednesday, so he needed some lab work done, blood tests and a urinalysis. That meant a trip to the vet. There are two ways to get urine from a dog. One way is to follow him around with a receptacle of some sort and catch it as it comes out of him. No dice on that method. Kirby could not understand what the hell Bunny was doing with that down there. And if Bunny couldn't do it, there was no effing way that a nice, male, teenaged vet assistant was going to get anywhere with it. We resorted to the other way, which involves a needle inserted into the source. While GK's blood work is fine, the urine results are not quite right, and may be nothing or may be something (where have I heard that before) so we have to get some more done in about three weeks to see if there is a kidney issue that requires attention.

To recap: Kirby has:

• seizures and a possible tumor or cerebellum disease
• neurological deficits
• maybe some kidney disease, maybe not
• allergies
• occasional skin infections from the allergies
• unspeakably foul ear gunk from occasional ear infections resulting from the allergies
• a disgusting and annoying licking habit that is partly from the allergies and partly from his psychological issues (see below)
• appallingly stinky flatulence resulting from the hypoallergenic diet we feed him because of the allergies
• bizarre phobias and sensitivities too numerous to list
• an acute sense of stranger-danger that prevents him from making friends with humans who are not Bunny or The Man
• and he's a bed hog

He's worth it. He's even worth the baths, which suck at least as much for us as they do for him.

Anyhoo, our pobre cito had to endure a vet visit with needles and strangers and a car ride that did not end at the dog park, and he was extra clingy for the rest of the day.

But he slept peacefully like the angel he is...

OR DID HE?

Dirtbunny, as you may recall, has a hearing impairment. She slept through Hurricane Isabel and, last night, she slept through Hurricane K-Hole. The Man reports that Kirby spent the better part of the night dancing around the house, flinging himself against the big bed (he has forgotten that he knows how to jump up), clawing at the bench at the foot of the bed, and generally making as big a pest of himself as he could in an attempt to get a boost onto the big bed. Or so The Man says. Bunny slept through all of it. The Man resisted GK's desperation and eventually, everyone went to sleep where he was supposed to go to sleep. The Man usually succumbs and gives in to whatever unreasonable nocturnal canine demands are made of him which, of course, only encourages the sort of bad behavior we had last night.

I believe The Man's reports of what happened last night. There was evidence.

1. Bunny's fleece-lined slippers showed signs of new chewage. Kirby likes to rip the fleece lining out of Bunny's slippers, but he only does it when he wants attention. I can leave them lying around all day while I'm at work and he ignores them. However, if I'm on the sofa and he's not, he'll shred them.
2. There was this:

Kirby's bed, to the right. Kirby's wubbie, dragged out of the bed and dumped four feet away, to the left. Untouched by human hands, I assure you. And Tiki's wubbie was in the bed with Tiki, as it was supposed to be. Whatever his other faults, Tiki is a champion sleeper. Night time is for sleeping in the dog bed with the wubbie and there to remain until the sun comes up or until the humans roust him.