*crosses fingers, cuts-and-pastes from notepad, and strikes off to edit html codings that I don't really understand*
Juventus 2:1 Bari
So that brings us to Sunday, which was the day that the Reds did not lose the Merseyside Derby, and the first day of the Ritorno for Juventus. Juve met Bari. Bari is at the bottom of the table, and the match was at the Stadio Olimpico, and Bari has already beat Juventus this year, and the only Juve striker who is not broken is Niccolo Giannetti. Four reasons for Juventus to choke hard. Did they?
I'm told this is a celebration. Romans. *shakes head*
No they did not.
Juventus 2:1 Bari
So that brings us to Sunday, which was the day that the Reds did not lose the Merseyside Derby, and the first day of the Ritorno for Juventus. Juve met Bari. Bari is at the bottom of the table, and the match was at the Stadio Olimpico, and Bari has already beat Juventus this year, and the only Juve striker who is not broken is Niccolo Giannetti. Four reasons for Juventus to choke hard. Did they?
I'm told this is a celebration. Romans. *shakes head*
No they did not.
WHAT THE FUCK ARE THESE DOING HERE?
IF I WANT THIS KIND OF THING, I HAVE TWENTY ZILLION CHANNELS OF AMERICAN SPORTS ON WHICH TO SEE IT. One of the reasons I came to Serie A is to gather material for sexual fantasies get away from this.
Happily, however, I saw Nedved in the stands and I saw Vincenzo in the stands but I did not see any cheerleaders in the stands and I only know about this because of Daylife.
Let's begin by sifting through the chaff.
Traore
I don't know, man. He's fast, which is enough to make you a superstar in the EPL, but I'd take Grygera's defensive skills over Traore's pace any day. I can't say about Grosso. I'm so bitterly angry at him for sucking so completely last season that I fear I can't be remotely objective about him. Grygera came on for Traore in the 78th, but there are no pictures.
Sorensen.
I like the kid and I think Marotta should buy him, but he's not really a fullback yet. He got burned by Alvarez and that led to Bari's goal.
And he always makes the same silly face when he goes up for headers, but that's a reason to keep him.
After the fail, LDN took Sorensen out and put in Motta.
Well, Juve paid for him so they might as well get some minutes out of him.
Plus maybe he'll find his form and the tifosi can like him for football reasons instead of the shallow non-football reasons we're stuck with now.
*sigh* Is it true that Juve once had great fullbacks in days of yore before calciopoli?
Carrying on with the chaff...........Momo.
He'sleaving staying leaving staying leaving staying.
Ooooooh. Pretty shiny thighs!
Anyone hungry for nachos?
Pepe
See, now that looks like he's doing something that could be both relevant and useful in the game of football. Contrast that with earlier in the season when he always looked completely disconnected from the ball.
Milos.
There's not much to say. Milos was contained.
He still falls down and his hair is still a problem.
He is communicating well enough to bicker with Italians .........
........tho I get the impression Italians will happily bicker with you no matter what language you speak.
Giannetti, who is the only non-broken striker on the squadra, started up top. I'm not sure if he even managed to touch the ball.
Oh. He did. That counts, I guess.
Please understand that I'm not just trashing the poor dear when I say that he is not enough striker to carry Juventus through its injury crisis.
And neither is Martinez, even if he can nominally play as a striker, which he did when he came on for Giannetti in the 57th. I'm glad he's back though. Juve needs some options out wide.
There. That's done. Wheat anyone?
Farro--savory, chewy, perfect in combination with earthy delights.
Believe it or not...
...these are the best pictures I have of Leo in this match. Do they not know that bb looks like this?
And that he makes RAWR like this?
And this?
And he makes love like this?
Photographers covering Juventus: GET WITH THE FUCKING PROGRAM! Want us to read your
I don't know, man. He's fast, which is enough to make you a superstar in the EPL, but I'd take Grygera's defensive skills over Traore's pace any day. I can't say about Grosso. I'm so bitterly angry at him for sucking so completely last season that I fear I can't be remotely objective about him. Grygera came on for Traore in the 78th, but there are no pictures.
Sorensen.
I like the kid and I think Marotta should buy him, but he's not really a fullback yet. He got burned by Alvarez and that led to Bari's goal.
And he always makes the same silly face when he goes up for headers, but that's a reason to keep him.
After the fail, LDN took Sorensen out and put in Motta.
Well, Juve paid for him so they might as well get some minutes out of him.
Plus maybe he'll find his form and the tifosi can like him for football reasons instead of the shallow non-football reasons we're stuck with now.
*sigh* Is it true that Juve once had great fullbacks in days of yore before calciopoli?
Carrying on with the chaff...........Momo.
He's
Ooooooh. Pretty shiny thighs!
Anyone hungry for nachos?
Pepe
See, now that looks like he's doing something that could be both relevant and useful in the game of football. Contrast that with earlier in the season when he always looked completely disconnected from the ball.
Milos.
There's not much to say. Milos was contained.
He still falls down and his hair is still a problem.
He is communicating well enough to bicker with Italians .........
........tho I get the impression Italians will happily bicker with you no matter what language you speak.
Giannetti, who is the only non-broken striker on the squadra, started up top. I'm not sure if he even managed to touch the ball.
Oh. He did. That counts, I guess.
Please understand that I'm not just trashing the poor dear when I say that he is not enough striker to carry Juventus through its injury crisis.
And neither is Martinez, even if he can nominally play as a striker, which he did when he came on for Giannetti in the 57th. I'm glad he's back though. Juve needs some options out wide.
There. That's done. Wheat anyone?
Farro--savory, chewy, perfect in combination with earthy delights.
Believe it or not...
...these are the best pictures I have of Leo in this match. Do they not know that bb looks like this?
And that he makes RAWR like this?
And this?
And he makes love like this?
Photographers covering Juventus: GET WITH THE FUCKING PROGRAM! Want us to read your
newspaper? Want us to visit your website? GIVE US MOAR LEO!
Hard Red Winter Wheat--sturdy, hardy, cornerstone for the staff of life
Gio!
nnnnnggghh
Durum wheat--whence comes semolina and, thus, indispensable for pasta.
The photographers continue to be smitten with Gigi. He's the only one who rates warm-up photos. Then again, these full-stretch practice saves are much more dramatic than the quad stretches with bunny ears you get from the outfield players.
What I would do for a Gigi thumbs-up.....
The tifosi love him too, and the curva pestered him until they got what they wanted.
Awwww. *sniff*
Dude can command a back four, that's for damn sure.
Oi! Over there!
Yummy furry arms.
I love it when you can hear him shouting.
*sigh*
Aww. New French guy has the respect not to make Gigi pick the ball out of the back of the net.
Total confidence.
It's time to say a word or two about Marcostorari. He supposedly wants to move on. Gigi is number one and Marcostorari wants to play. He's in fabulous form and his odds of landing a big money deal are fast fading at his age, especially if he rides the bench. I get that, and I respect it.
However, I'm mean and selfish. Pleeeze Don't Goooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Soft Red Winter wheat---best for the tenderest pastries and cakes, and the only acceptable choice for proper biscuits.*
*For our friends from the other side of the pond, please note that your "biscuit" is our "cookie." When I say "biscuit," I'm talking about the little quick breads made from buttermilk, butter, and flour. If you read somewhere that an American biscuit is like a scone, that's pretty much the same as saying bread is like cake, which it is, only not really. Biscuits are srsbz in the South. Don't get me started.
Were we talking about footie? We were talking about Alessa. Wait. Did I just get distracted in the middle of an Alessa moment? By food? What a bad example I'm setting for those of you who aren't lecherous old crones yet.
Ahhhhh. That's better. So Ale is broken, but he went 90 minutes anyway because there is no one else. They promised us Antonio Floro Flores, but they lied. I suppose it's just as well. Every time I hear "Antonio Floro Flores," my underpants fall off. And anyway, one day Vincenzo will be healthy for more than two weeks in a row.
TANGENT: Here's a fun fact for ya: Spurs paid 8 million pounds or euros (don't remember which and too lazy to look it up) for Rafa van der Vaart. Juve paid 15 million euros for Martinez. Just sayin.
So even though he played hurt, Alessa was en fuego the entire match. He was doing real captain stuff like yelling at his idiot teammates and kicking their sorry asses into gear.
Bari rudely beat the crap out of him the whole match.
Didn't matter.
Despite the attempts to force him into a receiving position....
....he did not give it up.
He stayed upright more than usual, which was good, cos it's not like anyone else was waiting for him in the box.
He says there will be a new contract by the first of March. There'd better be. After Quags, he's the team high scorer.
And you know? He really shouldn't be in a team with competent, properly-functioning strikers.
But there came a time when he won a free kick and The Man Upstairs parted the clouds and said, "Son? It's time."
Thus,
Um, I guess his shin guards are red or something.
Up and over the wall....
...curling into the top right-hand corner.
And then The Tongue.
No comment.
Hey Pepe! Nice to see you looking so pleased.
You have a lovely smile. You should smile more often.
Is it over? *peeks through fingers* Oh good. He put it back in. Much better.
Veins, bb. Come here so I can bitecha.
Instead of the manpile that we all prefer, bb took a long prance over to the curva...
...where he basked in the joy of his peeps....
...(and Momo)....
.....and it was really groovy to feel all that love....
....(that's Pepe behind him)....
....and then it started feeling a little grabby and uncomfortable and Ale remembered that he's "modest" and "shy."
So Pepe fished him out and led him back to safety.
Still loves scoring goals. Every single time. &hearts
Spelt---What? It's wheat.
I'm so very glad that Albertino is in bianconero, but I'm telling you, that face is not going to age well.
He doesn't look like he's concentrating. He looks like he just filled his pants.
And he fails at underlayers.
However, not every football player has to be every fangirl's sex slave, and Albertino is good for actual football. So there's a free kick, see, and then there's a Krap Klearance (because Juventini are not the only people who make Krap Klearances) and the ball went right to Albertino who sent it in on the volley--with gusto.
This wasn't it, but I don't have a photo of his game-winning screamer, so please use your imagination.
Albertino was quite pleased with himself.
The rest of us were pleased too. His was the go-ahead goal. It saved Juve from another shitty draw, which at this stage of the season, at home, and against this team, might have been the end.
LOL Gio.
Smile, Milos! What is wrong with you?
It's not really his job to score goals. We have strikers for that. hahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaha!
Oh God. Here we go.
Say my name!
Alberto!
Il Principino! Satisfied? Now give us some man love!
And so, Roman style, Motta grabs him and they powerslide right into the ad boards. Slam!
Thanks to this community, I associate Roman-style love with kink and aggression, and I'm starting to associate it with pain.
That's better. LOL Jorge and his big hug.
LOL Pepe and more unexplainable Roman stuff.
This I understand.
HEY EVERYBODY! GUESS WHAT DAY IT IS?
IT'S CLAUDIO'S BIRTHDAY!
Our Number 8 is 25 today. These are a few of my favorite recent Claudios. Feel free to share yours in the comments.
He knows how to wear a suit. Please let him teach the others.
Brute! heh heh
I'm sooooo hungryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.......
As long as this photo survives somewhere on the interwebs, Claudio can forget about acting hard. Doof.
Next match is Sunday away at Samp.
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