Saturday, July 2, 2011

Season Survey Post

Originally posted on June 10, 2011


I am so effing bored! The offseason absolutely sucks and checking for mercato news every ten minutes is not exactly calming me down or making me happy. I was looking for football on the TV listings and I actually paused to consider watching the USL, so help me God.

Since there is no new material, let's look back at Serie A 2010-11.


Today's topic is: THINGS THAT ARE AWESOME

There were many, of course, and these are only a few.

Best video evar of the year:






For me, it's the Norwegian fruit advert, first brought to our attention by Martha. Among other things, this introduced me to Morten Gamst Pederson, which means I was paying attention the day Joey Barton sucker punched him on the pitch for no reason.  Meaningless violence = awesome, as long as it's not IRL.

 
Last year this time, the future of one Rino Gattuso was uncertain.  He had spent a lot of the year injured and the rest of the time not playing very well.  This made Dirtbunny very very sad because she only discovered football in 2008 and never really got a chance to Rino at the peak of his form.



That was last year.  This year, Rino didn't have 90 minutes in him twice a week, but he made more than 35 appearances, many of them with the armband, and he was awesome.  He got two goals, one of which was not against Juventus.  He got into a notorious fight with Joe Jordan.  He was a meter 77 of tightly-coiled, barely controlled passione the whole damn year and he can still set things on fire with his eyes.  It can't last forever, and I'm glad I got to see at least one year of Rino when he didn't suck.



Parma took Amauri off Juve's hands this winter, but other than that, they did the Zebes no favors.  They killed Quags and they kicked stripey ass twice with their superior football.



oops. bad angle for Paletta.


However, one thing they did accomplish this season that was awesome?  They gave Massimo Gobbi a job stayed up.



For a while there, it looked like it wasn't going to happen, but it did and now we can all look forward to Parma kicking stripey ass again next season.



Speaking of Parma, in 2010-11, Amauri became an Italian and got his fucking call-up.



At the time, I saw this as a football atrocity and possible proof that Cesare was a highly disturbed man.  However, now that I've had nine months to think about it, I ask you all:  When's the last time you heard anything about Amauri getting his Italian citizenship or getting called up?  Exactly.  Nine months ago.  He got his call up, he got his cap, he sucked just like all us Juventini said he would, and now no one anywhere blathers on ignorantly anymore about Amauri on the Azzurri.  It's over, and now we can move on to more important things like monitoring Mario Balotelli's form and deportment and looking at photographs of Zlatan's shoes.




Another awesome thing?



Sammy Eto'o.  Great Grandmother's Spatula what a season he had!  Even a known Inter-hater and suspected Sammy-not-so-much-liker like myself has to acknowledge that he's a wonderful player.



Plus, without Sammy, there would be very few Matrix photos this year.



Just one more thing.  The other best video evar of the year:


clip 2 from dielle on Vimeo.

*dies all over again*


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Just love the lip sync on the YMCA video

Anonymous said...

Fruit = Healthy

Abs + Pants Being Removed = High Blood Pressure

Then HAIR? I thought all the metrosexuals were going for hair removal.