The last post of Zlatanmention

The word of the day is: NUTMEG



So. Let's take a trip down memory lane. It is January 13, 2009. Inter (booo) is playing Genoa in the Coppa Italia. It is a single elimination round. Coppa Italia is one of those tournaments that "no one cares about" but everyone wants to win if they happen to last that long. Many of the major teams tend to play their Primaveri (juniors) and their second-stringers to avoid injury to the superstars. That and the matches are squeezed in among league play matches, so they tend to occur midweek, and there is a fatigue issue.


So. Inter won the Scudetto last year and Genoa finished a surprising fifth place. Two good teams. Both teams want to win, but "don't care" if they lose. And why does Dirtbunny remember/care?
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Two words: ALESSIO SCARPI

Signor Scarpi was/is the second or third string goalkeeper for Genoa. He pretty much never plays. He's old (born in 1973) and way past his expiration date. Inter had major goal-scoring threats: former genius Hernan Crespo; crazy genius Adriano (who later flaked out and quit); and mega-genius Zlatan. Uh oh. Things look bad for Scarpi.


And yet, somehow, he had the match of his life. Inter pelted him with shot after shot. First was Crespo:

Now for Crespo not to score is not so much of a big deal anymore. He's formerly great. Maybe he'll be great again. Last year he was a frustrated shadow of his former amazing self. Anyway, when Crespo fails to score, it is usually because he misses. This time, it wasn't because of misses. His shots were on target. Scarpi was king of saves.




Second was Adriano:


Here we see Scarpi comforting Adriano Gigi-style after an Adriano fail. It was a thing to see. Adriano would make a strike and Scarpi would save it. At first, Adriano chuckled. Can't make them all. Then Adriano started making the "Are you Effing Serious?" face and the "You've Got to be Kidding Me" face and the "How Could that Not Go In?" face and the "Lord, Why Have Thou Forsaken Me?" face. I'm no Adriano fan, and even I was feeling sorry for him. Was it possible? Was Genoa going to win and knock Inter out of the tournament?



Finally, at minute 75, Adriano scored. But then Genoa equalized in minute 79. Tick tick tick. Minute 90 comes and goes and we are headed into extra time. Could Scarpi keep it up?

Alas, he could not. Cuchu Cambiasso scored on him at minute 100. Awww, too bad for Scarpi. What a shame. Well, maybe Genoa can equalize again. (Hey! "Equalize" is a Britishism, so maybe I should spell it "equalise.") Anyway.


And here comes the Zlatanmention.


How do you prevent an equaliser (hee hee)? You go up by two. Then the other team has to score three to win, which is harder than scoring two, and which packs a big psychological wallop. And so, minute 103, Zlatan scores:




It wasn't so much the fact of scoring but the manner of scoring. Maybe you can't tell from the above photo, but Zlatan nutmegged poor Scarpi. Oooh the shame!


Perhaps you need a hint. Here's another photo of the same goal:





Yeah. That's a nutmeg all right. Right through the wickets. Dang. Poor Scarpi. The game of his life. He deserved a little more dignity than that.



*sigh*


It was a sick, sad ending to the most memorable match of the year for me, and Alessio Scarpi is one of my heroes. You never know. You may think you're finished, but it's possible you have one more in you.


So long Zlatan. From now on, I do my mourning in private. And be sure to scrub those tiles until they gleam.