ADP: I don't know what you're talking about. I am a professional good sport. I feel nothing but the joy of competition, the glory of sport, and the fellowship of a match well played.
Dirtbunny: This is not a presser, babe. That half-hearted clapping for Zdenek's goal against Inter betrayed a certain bitterness. And it was there for all the world to see.
ADP: Oh Dirtbunny, you know me so well.
Dirtbunny: And there was no eye twinkle for Little Sebastian like there usually is.
ADP: I must admit that I was not pleased to be subbed out.
Dirtbunny: I know, baby.
ADP: I'm a striker, a trequartista, and lately, all they want me to do is provide service for that wanker, Iaquinta.
Dirtbunny: The best trequartista ever, baby.
ADP: I served him twice, perfect identical crosses twice in a row, and he blew it. Sure, you can miss the first one, but the second one was a gift. What is his problem?
Dirtbunny: He's a wanker, all right.
ADP: I can't believe Lippi calls him up and not me!
Dirtbunny: And that red card! Every idiot knows you get a yellow for taking your shirt off. What is he, 12?
ADP: Am I really so old? Am I really past it like they say?
Dirtbunny: No, dear, you're not past it. You scored a brace the other week.
ADP: Pippo got a hat trick.
Dirtbunny: Pippo has a midfield. And for every goal he scores, he's called offside 15, 20 times, at least. If you had Pippo's midfield, you'd score 30 goals a season.
ADP: Should I let them move me to centrocampista?
Dirtbunny: Oh, Alessa, only you know the answer to that. I love you no matter what position you play. I only want you to be happy.
ADP: Do you mean it?
Dirtbunny: Of course I do.
ADP: Then why are you always flirting with Ous Mellouli? I don't like it.
Dirtbunny: Well I don't like this:
Dirtbunny: What on earth were you thinking?
ADP: Don't change the subject.
Dirtbunny: OK. I'm sorry. He's only a swimmer. Who cares about swimmers?
ADP: Swimmers are big in Italia.
Dirtbunny: No more Ous. I promise.
ADP: That's my girl. Want to go shopping?
Dirtbunny: Oh Alessa, you know I don't care about your money. Let's stay home instead and I'll rub your shoulders.
ADP: It's going to thunderstorm. I'll get out the candles and open the soave.
Dirtbunny: You are too good to me.
ADP: Only the best for my Dirtbunny.
3 comments:
Get over these Italian "studs". With one of the world's lowest fertility rates they can't be all that you think they are. Maybe that explains all the "Italian" kissing on the field.
Aren't you maybe being a little harsh on poor Dirtbunny?
There is nothing wrong with the Italian players that a session with a good barber, a few piercings and a prominent tat won't fix.
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