The awesome thing about being a District Champion Pessimist, aside from the t-shirts and free drinks, is that I'm never disappointed. Sort of. I guess you can expect failure and think you're prepared for failure and still be disappointed by failure. This game sucked so bad that I stopped watching at half time and just sort of listened to the second half. I have never bailed on a Juve match before. Nevar. Sorry guys. You lost your grinta and I lost mine.
From Lecce's first attack, you just knew. By minute 12, the defense had started sucking so badly that Gigi had to come out of his box to shut down the attack and a clear shot on goal, which he did by committing a handball.
Sorensen: Please Mr. Mazzoleni, sir, don't send Gigi off. It was my fault. I'm having a terrible day.
Gigi was a good sport about it. There really wasn't any room for disagreement.
He handed off the captain's armband to Giorgio, bumped fists with Felipe Melo,.....
......and took the footballing version of the walk of shame,........
.....muttering what I can only assume were complaints about how the defense let him down AGAIN and torturing himself with thoughts that he could be making a bajillion euros for Manchester and hanging out with famous residents of Greater Mancunia such as Nani, Paddy, Edin Dzeko, Mario, the da Silva twins, and the Toure brothers.
There was no time to brood as he had to have a moment with Marcostorari before he disappeared into the tunnel. Later, in the showers, he decided that if occasional defensive shoddiness could be this frustrating, then playing in the EPL would kill him, so he was better off in Italy.
Because it's not a good idea to play without a goal keeper, someone had to be sacrificed to bring on Marcostorari, so Krasic went off. *pauses to give silent thanks that Marcostorsari stayed*
Sorensen, as I mentioned, started on the right, and he had nothing all night. Leo started in the center next to him, and he.......
.....well you all know how I feel about him, but sometimes.....
.....Fuck it. He's a grown up and I'm just going to say it:
When you suck, you suck. *pats him*
It's not like he didn't have company back there. Barza also was bad. Oh hell. They were all bad. It gives me no joy to have to say it over and over, so you can just infer suckage all around.
Awwwwww, Gio and his scabby knees. I have scarred-up knees too and am currently boasting quite an impressive 8-week-old booboo on the right knee.
He didn't exactly marshal his forces.
Choose one:
a. Awww, lay off Vincenzo. He wasn't the only one who failed to deliver.
b. Rip him a new one! Remind him what it means to wear the shirt! Remind him about the grinta!
He's probably depressed.
Who wouldn't be? You're a world champion but you haven't been in form in ages, you're always injured, you aren't getting Azzurri call-ups anymore, and all of a sudden Luca Toni is the starting center striker instead of you. Plus things have gotten weird with your Best Girl Dirtbunny. The only good news is that your hair grew back.
There's not much to say about Albertino except that it seems he got slightly higher ratings than most of his team mates. With 10 men, he had to play wider than he likes.
Juventus heavily dominated possession, so the mids had to be doing something right, except for Claudio, who failed to catch the photographers' eyes, again.
One strike on goal the whole match. I don't even know who got it.
Three goals in four matches. Patience, Dirtbunny. He hasn't been around long enough to sink into the zebra ennui.
That brings us to Il Capitano. I've got one working photo,.....
......one whingeing photo,.....
,,,and two pouty ones.
*pats him*
Loooca went off at half time, but her comes last today, just because.
He was there, flailing those giant limbs of his.
Making those faces he makes.
Failing beautifully.
It doesn't appear that anyone got hurt, so that's good. Gigi is suspended for Bologna, so that's bad. Marcostorari did not transfer during the winter break, so that's good. Ice storm in Our Nation's Capital, so that's good.
No jumps of joy. Just woeful tramping over to the fans to say "hey" and slink off to the showers.
proof of Claudio
I love you Gio, but that expression of regret is not helping me much.
Next match is Saturday against Bologna at the Stadio Olimpico, and after that is Milan.
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